


Don't.

by disneylover414



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Break Up, F/M, Hamilton References, Heartbreak, Planet Coruscant (Star Wars), References to Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008), Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:46:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27729733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disneylover414/pseuds/disneylover414
Summary: Obi-Wan told you he would never leave the Order for anyone. So what happens when you find out that he told his first love, Satine, that he would have left for her?
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Reader, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 53





	Don't.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! If you saw my fanfic I wrote in August, no you didn't. I LOVED WRITING THIS! Mainly so I could justify not revising hehehe. I hope you like it! It is loosely based on the song 'First Burn' which is a great song so I recommend. Thanks for reading and thanks to my 1 fan who comment on the fanfic we won't speak of.
> 
> I don't own any of these characters (obviously, but I wish I did).  
> ALSO NEW MANDO EPISODE TODAY AHHHH AHSOKA! I really hope shes in it!!

You were wandering around the Jedi Temple aimlessly. Obi-Wan had just been sent to Mandalore to discover the truth behind some claims against the Duchess Satine. Perfect timing really. You have a few days off at the same time as Obi-Wan and he was sent off planet at the last minute to reunite with his first love. Jealous? Of course not. You were a Jedi and at the end of the day you were trained to feel no emotion, only peace. And the most peaceful thing to do with your time would be to crawl into bed with Obi-Wan, but that wasn't an option today. So you decided to go and meditate instead. 

Unfortunately for you, it was just not your lucky day, all the meditation rooms were occupied. There goes that plan. You didn't really feel up to training today and so you figured you only really had one option left of things to do. Read. So off you went, slowly walking the halls of the temple to reach the archives. The archives held more knowledge than anywhere else in the galaxy, which made you completely in awe with the place. You arrived to find it practically empty, the usual since the clone wars had started, and started to stroll up and down the isles. You finally settled on a text about the origins of the code. You always found the code harsh and you never really understood why attachments were so bad. Neither you nor Obi-Wan had found yourselves tempted by the dark side because of your attachment. But temptation to leave the Order? Well that was another story. 

You could not count on one hand how many times you had brought up the idea of leaving the Order to Obi-Wan. You would leave in a heartbeat if he asked. You always thought your relationship was more important than the Jedi. To you, it was. But it never seemed like it was to Obi-Wan. He presented all the reasons as to why he could never leave, not for you. Not for anyone. He made it very clear to you that he never thought of leaving and he never planned to either. But he also never planned to break up with you. He always found being with you in secret was enough for him. He didn't need a life where he was free to be with you out in the open, just having you was enough. And it was enough for you too for a while, but as the war dragged on you couldn't help but pine for a life outside of the Order. Leave and spend your days with Obi-Wan with no responsibilities. Nothing keeping you apart. But he was always there to remind you that would never happen. 

Before he left though, he left you a letter. Not out of place at all, in fact completely normal. Over the years of being together you had accumulated thousands of love letters from him. All varying in length and subjects, but each one reminding you of how much he loves you. But this one was different. For the first time ever, he brings up marriage. Marriage. Simply putting at the end of the letter, 'maybe one day we could sneak of from the war and get married'. Not once had he ever spoken of marriage, you assumed it was completely off the table. Especially when he made no comment about it after finding out that Anakin had gotten married in secret. But now, in a random letter, he brings it up. You were confused by this but obviously extremely happy. 

The whole time Obi-Wan was away, you were either thinking about the letter or about everything he had told you about Satine. He never told you much, but you did always wonder if he ever got over her. He had told you about the year he spent with her, protecting her, when he was a Padawan. He told you about how he saved her and they fell in love but he never said much more than that. When you asked what happened when he left, he brushed it off telling you he left to become a Jedi and he pushed his feelings aside. He told you that there was no question about it, even if he had to break her heart (and his own) he had a loyalty to the Jedi that he was not willing to break for anyone. It saddened you to know that he put his feelings aside and left her behind, he could do the same to you.

\---

Finally, Obi-Wan had returned to Coruscant. And when he finally arrived at your quarters that night, you happily let him in. He looked tired, so you both took of your robes (folding them neatly of course) and got into bed. He snuggled into you from behind and whispered that he loved you before you fell into a deep sleep.

The next morning you woke up in the arms of your Jedi lover. You turned around in his arms and he woke up from your movements. You kissed him for what felt like the first time in forever and you both smiled into the kiss. You decided that you would go out and grab breakfast together at Dex's Diner.

Once you finished getting ready, you hear a knock at your door. On the other side stands Anakin, who although was one of your very close friends, didn't come to your room often so you were surprised to see him.  
"Anakin, hi!" you smiled widely.  
"Hi, can we talk." he sees Obi-Wan appear behind you (he knows about the two of you so its fine) "Alone."  
"Yes of course." you look behind at Obi-Wan, confusion on both your faces, and he kisses your cheek and steps outside your room. Anakin enters and closes the door behind him.  
"What's up? Is it Padme? Is she okay?" you were getting nervous as it was not clear what Anakin was here for.  
"No, no. Padme is fine. I just... I don't really know how to tell you but... Something happened while we were away. And I... I feel like as your friend I should tell you."  
"What are you talking about? What happened?" you were really nervous now, what did he need to tell you that Obi-Wan couldn't hear.  
"The Duchess was about to be captured and she... She told Obi-Wan that she loved him. And Obi-Wan told her that had she asked him, he would have left the Jedi order."  
You gasped. You were shocked. Obi-Wan made it extremely clear he never even thought of leaving the Order, but he clearly had.  
"Oh." you tried to focus your breathing and calm yourself down. Did Obi-Wan seriously tell you he wanted to marry you and then tell someone else he would leave his whole life behind for them. The attachment rule finally made sense. It was like all the pieces fell into place. Anger leads to the dark side. 

And you were angry. 

The first thing you think about are the letters hidden in a box and how much you want to get rid of them. His sweet words that you once believed and held dear, now seemed out of place in your room. So the only thing you can think to do is grab the box and take it over to your window. You take the lid off and look down at all the letters stacked neatly inside. Anakin had absolutely no idea what you were about to do but he didn't know if he should be here for it so he headed for the door. You pick up a few letters, open your window and hover them over the edge. You take a deep breath and drop them. Anakin opens the door and slips out quietly. Obi-Wan was waiting right outside and when he hears the door open he stands up straight. Anakin doesn't look him in the eye and just walks away which worries Obi-Wan so he quickly enters your room to see what has happened.  
"What are you doing?" he starts to walk over to you but you put your hand up to gesture for him to stop.  
"Don't. Don't take another step in my direction."  
"(Y/N), tell me what's going on. We can talk about this. Whatever this is we can talk about it. Please." he was practically begging you to stop and talk to him but you weren't having any of it. However, you were thankful he didn't try to walk any closer.  
"You may be known as the negotiator Kenobi, but don't think you can talk your way into my arms." you looked him right in the eye before turning and throwing more letters out. You pick up the most recent letter and open it. You reread it, while he just watches you, and you feel like you don't even know who he is anymore. You rip the letter in half and chuck it of the window, watching the slight breeze carry it away. You throw more letters out and Obi-Wan just stands there in shock.  
"Why are you doing this? Why are you throwing everything away?" he asks you, as if he hasn't done anything.  
"You have thrown it all away!"  
"What have I done?"  
"What have you done?" you pause before asking. "Is there anyone you would leave the order for?" you keep throwing letters out as he speaks.  
"This again? No of course not, you know this. I've told you before I won't leave the order for you or for anyone, but that doesn't have to stop us from being together. The Jedi need me and they need you. We have a duty and we cannot leave during a war."  
You throw the last letters out.  
"And I guess Satine was an exception then?"  
"What?"  
"I know you what you told her."  
"How do yo-"  
"Anakin."  
"He told you?"  
"Yes because hes my friend."  
"I thought she was going to die."  
"So?"  
"She told me she still loved me and I told her if she had asked I would have left, but I was a stupid Padawan who didn't know what he was doing."  
"Yes, but you are a grown man now who knew what he was doing when you told her."  
He stays silent for a few minutes just looking at the floor. "Are you seriously going to do this?"  
"Do I have a choice?"  
"There's no one else I want but you. I meant what I wrote. I want to marry you." he says this like it changes everything.  
"And a few days later you tell your first love that you would leave everything behind for her."  
"Left. I would have left everything behind for her. Not now."  
"But for me not ever." he doesn't know how to respond to this. But you have had enough now. "I think you should go."  
"I love you. I still want to be yours."  
"Don't."


End file.
